P.E.C.c. Le Regole Nascoste della Vita
(The Hidden Rules of Life)
®
7
Always –Existential Observations
The Alcohol Abuse Existential Function will be explained in the chapter What is the link between Talent, alcohol, drugs and smoking?
The Infantile Couple Program is based on the Relationship of Reciprocal Dependence between two people:
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Familial Couple: with a parent, a sister or a brother
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Relatives Couple: with grandmother, grandfather, aunt, uncle, cousin, etc.
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Private Couple: an affective partner, wife-husband without children
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Social Couple with a peer, coach, or teacher.
Apart from sexual attraction that sometimes also occurs between parents and children, and/or financial support, its Function is sharing in the private and public sphere of cultural, artistic, social, sports, lifestyle and professional interests.
In this story, the relationship between Travers, the father, and his daughter Helen is based on a Creator Familial Couple Program, which turns out to be more important than the family itself (Private Family Program).
The father-daughter Complacency is mutual: when he returns home, often drunk and late, she is the only one waiting and happy to see him. His wife, busy with the two younger daughters and housework, lives in the deepest discouragement due to the forced transfer of the family, from the city to an isolated Australian inland village. Because of his irresponsible behavior, her husband had been demoted to running a small local branch of the bank. The child knows about her father's alcohol addiction, every day experiences her mother's anger and frustration, the constant fights after her father's misbehaviors. However, she also knows that she is special to him, as they both have a fervent imagination. Although he is the only one who financially supports the family, she agrees to please him even when he asks her to bring him the whiskey, hidden by her mother, in exchange for a fairy tale or a ride on his shoulders, singing or creating stories. One stimulates the imagination of the other, giving their life a vision that goes beyond Needs such as eating, studying, and working.
The promise that he will be always there for her and vice versa, is not expressed verbally, but originates from the Existential Mirroring already in place during pregnancy, reinforced by the Creator Familial Couple Program during childhood. Their Bond is experienced by the girl as stronger than alcohol, illness and death, it’s her Creator/father’s promise, confirmed every day by the privileged treatment she receives from him.
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Extract from the book “We Cannot Escape from Ourselves”.